Kill the Previous Poster!

Joeyray's Bar
Sadly, the Zerg swarm cannot turn Psionic energy or shadows into biomass, as such, KnarledOne has been tricked. In fact the cake was made of him, and I start to consume the delicious cake.
However, mah best bud Abathur saves me. I thank him by giving him a Sandgorgon to assimilate. He uses its DNA to create a caste capable of absorbing spirit essence and psionic energies.
A creeper walks up behind you when you are mining for diamonds.
You live, but the diamonds are destroyed, so you ragequit and kick your computer.
You die of blood loss and electrocution.
My clone completes its incubation within KnarledOne, and tears out of his stomach using infested Scythe Pistols. He gets into a Viking, lifts off, and lands on top of Beowulf, squishing him.
But, then, suddenly, Baby Mario appears, and suddenly squishes Yoshi's back.
The player decides to play Zelda instead and pulls marioparty out of the gamecube with no memory card the reality ditao existed in suddenly fades into oblivion.
Fluffythepoo suddenly turns around and sees his long-time arch enemy: Winnie the Poo. Winnie then says in a deep voice: "Hello, my name is Winnie the Poo. You killed my father. Prepare to die," and proceeds to best you in a swordfight. You are stabbed in the chest, and he drinks your blood like Honey.
A clone of me in an Odin is walking along and sees Mariny. The Odin then proceeds to step on Martiny and then barrage cannon the dead body. And for good measure, a nuke.
Lunamaster turns as his victory shifts to horrified dismay. A massive fleet of malevolent super blimps has arrived to bomb everything within a 2000 km radius to ashes. As the bombs begin dropping, Lunamaster can only raise the white flag before being incinerated in the cauterized region.

All hail the Malevolent Super Blimp Fleet, from which all true Evil Admirals originate from!
Merely seconds after Ultranoob realizes his mistake of dispatching his whole Super Blimp Fleet as the sky darkens above him as a massive fleet of Behemoth Class Battlecruisers exits warp space above the planet. *On the bridge of the the only Gorgon Class Battlecruiser* The fleet admiral looks down at Ultranoob and smirks "pff n00b, nuke the planet from orbit, irradiate everything, leave nothing standing!" As the bombardment commences Ultranoob gets out his deck-chair and relaxes knowing that he cannot escape the nuclear dawn.

EDIT: correcting syntax and grammar
I step out of a rift, but finding myself in the wrong continuum, I leave, with the rift turning into a black hole. The black hole begins swallowing up the world and the fleets, as well as the people, and then this thread.
using the momentum gained from the blackhole's gravitational pull the Gorgon class BC jumps into warpspace to the protoss Mainfleet. Talking to Selendis the Protoss agree to send a shadow assassin to kill ShadowFury. Merely 2 hours later the Dark Templar whispers from the shadows "The deed is done, he didn't even know what sliced him.... Now, where is that Zealot that said his wife was for hire... oh sh*t you weren't supposed to hear tha..."
While Theata is relaxing in bed with the female Protoss, suddenly a shadow falls over the building. Telling the Protoss to put her clothes on, he jumps out of bed to find a gigantic metal head, bigger then a galaxy. Then a giant arm pulls back and a drill spears out, and a giant echoiing voice shouts, "ギガドリルブレーカー!"
You choose to drink and drive.
You choose to try a tasty red wine, but then you find out that it isn't tasty wine at all, it's pretty tasteless. Then you find out that it's actually Tasteless' blood laced with Arsenic, and you die of blood loss.
Donkey kong knocked on your door and went ape @#$% on you.
Taking nearly 2 days to complete my cell regeneration I awaken. Quickly boarding a damaged Super-carrier I commandeer it, it has full shields and looks like its only remaining damage was some minor scratches on the hull, Looks like I scored big this time! I come to Joeyray's to search for Martiny only to find out that he was killed by PanzerIV's Donkey King. Mad that someone stole my revenge I set out to find Panzer. Finally after days of searching I find him relaxing on the plains of Roxara, descending into the planets lower atmosphere I release the interceptors to destroy PanzerIV. Seeing his body eviscerated by the plasma beams from the interceptors I retreat into deep space to investigate the capabilities of this Super-Carrier.

I leave behind a chicken for the next poster to kill in place of myself!
Who needs blood?
Not me, that's who.
As the chicken realizes you are leaving it to die, it peaks out your eyes in a fit of rage.
You stumble blindly into a nearby ravine, where you contract a terminal case of "Dead".
Theata mistakenly believing his interceptors not only killed me but eviscerated me was wrong. I lost my left arm and both legs but I survived the ruthless assault. Laying on the ground not ready to die I realized the man I set donkey kong to kill must have been in some kind of blood fued with theata. This fued now has become personal. Looking back up at the sky watching theata ready to bounce out of the sector. He was prepareing to beam down his chicken.

Until a speeder bike came rolling through the plains with a man. My eye device read that it was a mercenary named avikon with ties to martiny. Perhaps he was sent to permanetly kill theata after his regeneration. Avikon pulled aside and aimed a deivce at his chicken prepareing to go down in place of his beloved commander. Avikon mind manipulated the chicken into attacking him and he poked out his eyes. Theata falling from his ship into a ravine.

avikon then turned to me pulling out his pistol. I then pulled out my laser and shot him between the eyes. He fell dead to the ground. And for me? Well, my droid located my distress signal and took me back to my home sector where i was treated for prosthetic limbs.
Seeing as I've been dead by being crushed by an Odin, Nuked, drinking and driving, and getting pummeled by a giant Monkey, and have been simply orchestrating things from the beyond, I decide to regenerate by body to wreak havoc once again.

In doing so, I terrify the poor Panzer the 4th by watching a man get built cell by cell in front of his very eyes, that he flees in terror, only to get actually vaporized by Theata's Interceptors.

I then laugh, and tell Simon he did a good job, who thanks me and spins while flying off.

Join the Conversation

Return to Forum