Zorca's Text Adventure

Posts: 3,492
03/10/2011 1:13 PMPosted by Zorca
Decide to walk down to the local night elf stripclub.

In your drunken state, you imagine a race of pointy eared and blue humanoids. You decide to walk down the street in hopes to find a house of them. You trip on a dead person.

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[INVENTORY]
Chicken Noodle Soup

Decide the dead person looks tasty and put it in the stove back at home.
Posts: 8,700
03/10/2011 1:11 PMPosted by IAreLemons
Decide to walk down to the local night elf stripclub.

You, my friend,... you are the man!
Posts: 3,057
03/10/2011 1:14 PMPosted by IAreLemons

In your drunken state, you imagine a race of pointy eared and blue humanoids. You decide to walk down the street in hopes to find a house of them. You trip on a dead person.

---------
[INVENTORY]
Chicken Noodle Soup

Decide the dead person looks tasty and put it in the stove back at home.

The dead person is too heavy for you. You try to lift him up. At this point you're smashed, and you hear a screech down the road. You're hands are covered in blood, although you pick up an arm from him. You put it in your briefcase, deciding it's good enough

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[INVENTORY]
Chicken Noodle Soup
Severed Arm
Posts: 3,492
03/10/2011 1:16 PMPosted by Zorca
The dead person is too heavy for you. You try to lift him up. At this point you're smashed, and you hear a screech down the road. You're hands are covered in blood, although you pick up an arm from him. You put it in your briefcase, deciding it's good enough

Start muching on the arm and go to see who's screeching.
Posts: 8,700
03/10/2011 1:17 PMPosted by IAreLemons
Start muching on the arm and go to see who's screeching.

I hope its a dancing night elf, personally,...
Posts: 104
03/10/2011 1:18 PMPosted by Phinix
Start muching on the arm and go to see who's screeching.

I hope its a dancing night elf, personally,...


with more beer
Posts: 8,700
03/10/2011 1:20 PMPosted by PLATINUM

I hope its a dancing night elf, personally,...


with more beer

Amen, bruddah!
Posts: 3,492
I think Zorca's given up.
Posts: 8,700
03/10/2011 1:25 PMPosted by IAreLemons
I think Zorca's given up.

Give the people what they want, Zorca!
blue, pixelated bewbies swishing smoothly to the pre-defined movements of Alizée's infamous stripper groovin'-nicity-ness!!!

Also,... beer, please.
Edited by Phinix on 3/10/2011 1:32 PM PST
Posts: 3,057
03/10/2011 1:17 PMPosted by IAreLemons
The dead person is too heavy for you. You try to lift him up. At this point you're smashed, and you hear a screech down the road. You're hands are covered in blood, although you pick up an arm from him. You put it in your briefcase, deciding it's good enough

Start muching on the arm and go to see who's screeching.

You take out the arm and start gnawing at it. A chunk of raw flesh is swallowed and you feel positively ill. You walk down the street, bloody army in hand, sort of Z-walking across the road in a drunken and crazy state. You wonder what sort of marvels will be there. You step over the mass of dead people carefully, they all appear to be torn up.
Posts: 468
Edit: i kinda like his better :P
Keep walking towards the sound of screeching.
Edited by RCIX on 3/10/2011 1:39 PM PST
Posts: 3,492
Defecate on one of the bodies and continue walking.

EDIT:Curse you RCIX...
Edited by IAreLemons on 3/10/2011 1:40 PM PST
Posts: 3,057
Edit: i kinda like his better :P
Keep walking towards the sound of screeching.


03/10/2011 1:39 PMPosted by IAreLemons
Defecate on one of the bodies and continue walking.

You continue with your drunken hobble, stopping to throw up on a dead person. Eating raw arms isn't safe, apparently. After you're done vomiting, you decide to finish the dead person off, defecating on him. After that, you start further walking towards the screeching. It is getting later, and darker.
Posts: 468
Look around for useful tools
Posts: 3,057
03/10/2011 1:42 PMPosted by RCIX
Look around for useful tools

You stop , deciding before walking head first and looney into the screeching, to see what tools are available. The dead massacre is starting to get thinner, and you see one of the bodies had tried to defend itself with a newspaper. A look to your right and you see a broken mailbox post, a look to your left and you see a garden hose. You stop to think about what to do, scratching your chin with the severed arm.
Posts: 468
Drop severed arm and take broken mailbox post
Posts: 3,492
Stick one end of the garden hose in anus.
Posts: 3,057
03/10/2011 1:45 PMPosted by RCIX
Drop severed arm and take broken mailbox post
You drop your severed arm onto the ground, and pick up the broken mailbox post. You feel it's wooden texture, getting a splinter. It seems like it might make a good weapon if you need one. One end is pointed like a stake. The screeching starts to get more quiet, and dim wails are heard.

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[INVENTORY]
Chicken Noodle Soup
Broken Mailbox Post
Posts: 468
Investigate wails

(I think i'm the only one keeping this from taking a disturbing turn :P)
Edited by RCIX on 3/10/2011 1:48 PM PST
Posts: 3,492
Stab self in the leg.

(stop posting so I can make this take a disturbing turn)
Edited by IAreLemons on 3/10/2011 1:49 PM PST
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