Topic DarkBlade planning thread
Edited by Zarkun on 12/21/12 1:43 PM (PST)
This is also a discussion thread, just no room in the title.
The Arrival of Ser
The continent of Serin was once a barren wasteland, surrounded by oceans. Nothing could grow there and it was roamed by ferocious, man eating beasts. Then, about ten thousand years before our story takes place, a large stone of purity and health and magic power crashed into the middle of the continent and that all changed. Soon, trees and grass and plants of all kinds began to grow from where the stone had crashed, and spread across the continent. Many of the violent beasts soon calmed and became friendlier, and people and other kinds of animals began to appear, the ocean became vibrant with life, and a river of great abundance soon flowed throughout the continent. The stone gave off an aura of life, and the people of Serin called it Ser, and called the continent Serin, in honor of the crystal that had allowed them to come into existence.
The rise and fall of the Ancients
However, during all this, Chaos, Ser’s opposite, instilled in the most ferocious of the beasts who had existed before Ser’s arrival with power and intelligence, and they came to be known as the Ancients, beings who had existed before Ser and had resisted it’s calming influence. Using their abilities, they attacked the civilizations that the new races of humans and elves had begun to build, bringing the two races to their knees. However, before the Ancients could cause any further harm, a mighty army of the two combined races fought back. Many casualties were received from the army, but eventually the mages of the two races were able to seal them away along with their master, Cortus, who swore that they would return to this world to exact revenge and destroy the Ser. Peace once more enveloped the continent of Serin, but it wasn’t to last.
The Replons and Savior of Ser
Eight thousand years passed, during which the elves had begun to construct a dream world so that they had somewhere to call home, without incident and civilization spread throughout Serin. Soon humanity had built machines that ran off the power of Ser, known as Replons. The Replons served many purposes, building, healing, but, the grossest us of Ser’s power, were the militant Replons, used to begin enforcing humanity’s will on the elves. This rarely worked however, as the elves and humans were never close and the elves lived in the trees, so the most the Replons could do is keep them in their trees, which didn’t bother them any at all.
However, there was a price for these machines that humans didn’t know about, and soon found out. With each new Replon Ser’s power deteriorated, and eventually Chaos took over once more, and the Replons ceased their production, and the oceans flooded the land, dividing the continent. The world was beginning to come apart when a mysterious person appeared and returned power to Ser, though not as strong as before. Now the world is once again at peace, and it is slowly returning to Ser.
The Breaking of Ser
With the Savior of the Ser having done his job, he took up residence inside the tower built for the Ser, watching over it and keeping it in balance. To assist with this, he assigned masters to control the water, Aquos, earth, Gaia, winds, Aero, sun, Solaris, moon, Luna, and fire, Ignus. These masters balanced out Ser’s various powers, making sure that none were more powerful then the others. Every four years, an event where the sun and the moon formed an eclipse occurs and the Ser is self balanced, allowing for the masters and peoples of the realm to take time to spend time in each others company. Everything was in perfect balance and came to be called the Balance Day. However, it is during this day that the Ser is most vulnerable.
During one Balance Day, the Ser tower came under attack from Solaris, who felt sorry for the Savior’s blight, and wanted the Savior of Ser to come with her. Together they left the tower and soon the tower guards and Solaris’ followers came to a disagreement. Unable to handle this, the Ser began to overload and eventually exploded, sending it’s fragments all across the continent in many pieces of varying size. Soon the land that was unprotected by larger shards of Ser were reclaimed by Chaos.
The explosion cause the Ser to break apart into many pieces, all different sizes, and disperse among the two continents. To avoid the death that Chaos was causing, humans fled to places with larger pieces of Ser protecting them, and the elves began to return to the second place they’d created, a dreamlike world. Soon, there were few elves still on Serin.
Survivors of the second great cataclysm, called the Breaking, couldn’t survive in areas without the pieces of Ser, and those who had followed the Masters had given their lives to return the continent to it’s former state. Now the world is full of those who fight to protect the pieces and those who steal them and use them for their own needs. This, is where our story begins….
It looks good, as far as criticism...
1) Note: I will be nitpicking and trying to find everything because that's what you want us to do.
2) You sort of skimmed over the fact that humans essentially controlled the Elves (?), which I would think would be a pretty major lore point in that the Elves would feel betrayed and hate the humans.
3) I'm assuming the origin of Ser is going to be explained, because that's something that would be interesting to know. If not, you may wish to consider that.
4) See above, except with "Chaos".
5) If the Elves were under human control and influence, how would they create the dreamworld?
I may see more things later, but this is what I picked up on in a few minutes. Still though, really nice lore.