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The smell of delicious morsels hung in the air like a Horde Strike Force member afraid to land for fear of being camped. Pilgrim's Bounty had finally arrived in Azeroth. As always, The Scarlet March gathered together for an evening of debauchery and fine foods. Each member had brought a mouth-watering dish to share among his bretheren.
Once all of the food had been laid out, everyone grabbed a plate and prepared to dine on the bounty of the land. However, after loading up their plates with a smörgåsbord of options, it soon became evident that something was amiss.
"We only have side items" Thweebo said, before being told firmly to shut the hell up.
"Actually, he's right. Who was supposed to bring the turkey? Wasn't it Vaelith?" Royastrasz said, his concern growing.
Vaelith looked up sheepishly.
"I was gonna get some turkeys, but then I got high."
"What did we say about flying at that elevation? The thin air affects your memory!" Manari chastised him.
"No way there are any turkeys left now" Imizael said, her fist clenched in famished balls of rage.
Smaepdii twirled his robust mustache, an obelisk of masculine virtue, growing from underneath his chiseled nose.
"Turkey is overplayed." Smaepdii said, a devious smile growing across his face.
Most of the Horde did not expect the Scarlet March's arrival in Thunderbluff, least of all Cairne Bloodhoof. He was momentarily curious of their intentions, but any question as to their motivation soon evaporated when he noticed that they were all wearing bibs and equipped with steak knives. Cairne put up a small fight, hopeful that someone would come to rescue him from The Scarlet March's growling bellies. Unfortunately, when he saw that the Horde Strike Force was the only guild insane enough to stand between TSM and their holiday meal, he knew that all hope was lost. Destroying the last of the Horde Strike Force, the Scarlet March again turned their hunger pangs towards Cairne. Helpless against them, he laid himself down, and offered his carcass unto the March.
"You can really taste the attunement to nature" Moguna said as he tore from her bit of Cairne steak.
"Of course you can," Josheb smiled "It's extremely fresh."
"We really should have killed him before we began eating" Thweebo quipped, as he cut another strip steak from Cairne's still warm flesh.
Full on delicious sacred shaman meat, the Scarlet March collapsed in a giant snuggle pile, and drifted off to sleep.
TL;DR - We killed Cairne Bloodhoof. He will never respawn again, and now in Maelstrom lore, he has been eaten by the Scarlet March.
Edited by Josheb on 11/23/2010 12:01 AM PST
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