2b. Huntar Lewtz!
First, don't panic. Refer back to part 1a: communication. When the loot drops, ask if its ok to roll on it. Most groups won't have a problem. Some people will cry, but simply pointing out that you are being courteous and asking will generally simmer those people down. Alternatively, if someone is rolling on something they can't use and you can, give them the benefit of the doubt. Chances are they aren't trying to screw you over, they just clicked too fast (we all do).
Inevitably there will be some argument over items. At low levels, you can roll 'Need' on just about anything you want. And people will. The shadowpriest will roll on the DPS sword with the summoned dragon pet proc. Its going to happen. Alternatively, you might want to get a non-traditional piece of gear (i had grey boots until level 33 and finally decided that cloth boots that boost my spellcasting will be just fine for now).
Second, try to trade items to solve problems. Currently, there is an issue with cross-server trading. Blizzard doesn't allow it. So chances are pretty good that once an item gets in someones hands, they won't be able to trade it regardless of the time remaining to trade the item. If they are on your server, great!
Third, your item was ninja'd. Yup, no ambiguity here, that item you wanted was just rolled on and won by the rogue in spellpower leather. What do you do now? Well, you have three options:
1) stop. You can choose to not continue with said rogue unless the item changes to your hands (or the next person who won the role and will use it). This could be dropping group, attempting to kick the rogue, or porting out to Stormwind to await a kick from the group.
2) get revenge. continue healing the run, but constantly berate said rogue about stealing your loots and refuse to heal the filthy ninja.
3) get over it. Continue healing the run, shaking your head at how bad some people are.
This is where many groups can break down. Ultimately, at any level prior to max level (and even then unless this is a raid situation) option three is going to be your best bet. Yeah, it sucks. Your character is not as strong for having missed out on that piece of equipment and your progression as a powerhouse of healing is stunted as a result of someone elses greed or incompetence. Heres a little secret though: its not the end of the world.
Loot tables are limited, items will drop again, and (most times) there are alternatives to the piece you lost out on. At lower gear levels, you are going to replace just about everything in your possession (with the exception of heirlooms) at every other level or thereabouts. Don't stress, add that person to your ignore list if they were really bad and move on. Your play experience will improve by simple fact of not stressing out about that guy or girl being a clown.
Edited by Creverus on 11/30/2010 10:13 AM PST