Blizzard Employee handbook exerpt:

85 Orc Warlock
9535
Quoted from Fardoragh in tech support

What to do when Game servers go down:
Call the intern Rick We're going to needs lots of Coffee.
Calmly view Forum posts
resist the urge to ban irratating players.
find a simple post to post to assuring players that everything will be fine
read more posts
again resist the urge to ban players for their forum posts
Drink more coffee
Check in with the server maintenance team.
Remain calm when you see tech's running and screaming and see servers on fire.
Make another forum post assuring players everything is fine and servers will be up soon
Drink more coffee
ignore the panicked screams of your co-workers.
Drink more coffee
read more forum posts
again resist the urge to ban players for their posts.
let the fire department in to put out the fire in the server room.
ignore the smell of burning servers and human flesh.
Drink more coffee
Read more forum posts
resist the urge to ban players for their comments
Ban a player (it will help you deal with the stress)
Drink more coffee
Yell at Rick the intern for using milk and not half and half.
Check in with the remaining tech's to find out the server status
make a forum post assuring players that everything is fine and the servers will be back up shortly.
Note: if this is a login server issue you will be required to select an intern and sacrifice them to the server gods.
Find Rick the intern
Kill Rick the intern
Drink more coffee
Have the trolls in accounting place Rick the intern's soul into the login server.
Inform players that the login servers are working again.
Reply Quote
84 Troll Druid
810
R.I.P. Rick
Edited by Zenjai on 1/1/2011 9:53 PM PST
Reply Quote
80 Troll Rogue
3455
We love you Rick, hang in there!
Reply Quote
85 Human Mage
4055
Rick got rolled >.>.....see what I did there @_@
Reply Quote
87 Blood Elf Hunter
2350
Rick had to die so I could keep farming leather.
Reply Quote
90 Worgen Warlock
0
Rick is my hero
Reply Quote

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