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My dearest horde players,
As you may have noticed, Alliance loses Tol Barad most of the time. True, we occasionally get a win, and for that I am most grateful to the horde for showing your mercy, but most of the time we lose. So I have a request. Once it has become apparent that alliance is losing*, I like to take off my clothes and dance naked with the horde. Unfortunately, most of you slaughter me before I can run up to you and /dance.
This makes me a sad gnome. Since we lose TB most of the time, I'd like to spend more quality time naked dancing with horde members. So when you see me with my clothes off running toward you, please don't slaughter me yet. I'm just a gnome looking for some love.
*I define alliance losing as when a majority of the below occurs:
(1) Alliance decides not targeting healers is a viable strategy.
(2) Alliance decides trying to "defend" (lol) against the horde zerg is a viable strategy.
(3) Alliance thinks running around in circles with siege engines is helpful
(4) Alliance are standing outside the base in the doorway being farmed.
(5) Alliance are running around on the roads instead of going to bases.
Your Favorite Gnome
Edited by Ionadh on 6/19/2011 5:04 PM PDT
-.- sorry sir but when we are in the middle of a warzone like Tb. I can not promise my shadowbolt won't fly up your naked ass out of pure accident. I reccommend keeping your clothes on so horde can fling shadowbolts at you, without your butt being hurt.
(1) Horde decides not targeting healers is a viable strategy.
(2) Horde decides trying to "defend" (lol) against the horde zerg is a viable strategy.
(3) Horde thinks running around in circles with siege engines is helpful
(4) Horde are standing outside the base in the doorway being farmed.
(5) Horde are running around on the roads instead of going to bases.
Happens on both sides of the fence I assure you.
I have naked Kat macro'ed for such an occasion but... you might not like the whole eye level situation.
Edited by Katsumo on 6/20/2011 8:36 AM PDT
I would like to thank the most gracious horde for their responses. I understand sometimes its hard in the heat of battle to distinguish which gnomes are sexy and just want to dance with you and which gnomes are sexy and intent on killing you. So if I get slaughtered the first few times trying to /hug and /love you while naked, I understand. But lets try to make sure it doesn't happen over half a dozen times, mmk? And we of course will do the same for our fellow hordies Janjapi - just make sure you don't get to close to me at eye level, Katsumo. You might step on me.
Therefore I propose a naked dancing truce:
"IN GNOMEREGAN, JUNE 20, 2011
The unanimous Declaration of the gnomes of Light Brigade
When in the Course of gnomish events it becomes necessary for one people to dissolve the political bands which have connected them with another faction and to assume among the races of Azeroth, the separate and nude station to which the Laws of Nature and of Nature's God entitle them, a decent respect to the opinions of gnomekind requires that they should declare the causes which compel them to the naked dancing."
I'm working on the rest of it.
Naked gnomes are a plague to this world and need to be killed off instantly. No mercy, straight up head shot. They are worse then the naked night elves dancing on the postboxes.
Don't cry though little gnome, I'm sure Blizzard will find another way to make it so that horde will feel the need to throw games in order to get 1800 honor per game.
I personally have no sympathy for the weak...
I think most forsaken should be shot in the head for some reason, maybe because they are brain eating smelly sacks of bones and rotting flesh, though I wont kill Merlinii, he friendly undead. I want goblin punting to be a new sport, 100 points for punting a goblin into deathwing's mouth and when you hear the crunching sounds of their bones breaking as deathwing eats them, but thats just me.
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