The Roleplayer's Guide to the Great Dark

85 Blood Elf Paladin
So, you want to Roleplay on an Rp-PvP realm, hmm? What in the Great Light's name has gotten to your head? World PvP is broken down to ganks and more ganks? What's that? Camped for half an hour by someone bored enough to waste time on you? Yes, that's ganking and there's nothing you or Blizzard can do about it. Or should I say Activision-Blizzard?

Well, too bad. You're on LH because you were dumb enough to think this is a good idea or too poor or too lazy to start somewhere else.

See those two freaks walking and talking like they think they are an actual Hero of Azeroth? No! They're all gone. But you're gonna put them back on the map, why else did you open this thread for?

Who am I? WHO AM I? I'm the nicest damn person you're gonna talk to or get help from in this game. I am mean, but I am fair, to me you're all equal uneducated pieces of PvE-Hero trash.

So what the fel happened to all the Roleplayers? It goes like this: People Roleplay( I mean, why the heck not, people Roleplayed before video games, you're not better thana roleplayer, you're playing a child's game. It's rated T for Teen, you're playing a TEEN GAME), people who don't understand make fun of RP and grief, Griefed Roleplayers open tickets and nothing happens, Griefed person gets suspended suddenly and tells friends that some losers reported him. Said friends start griefing and Griefed Roleplayers report them? See where this is going?!

Group of flustered Roleplayers leave for Wyrmrest Accord and stay there. More like Dramarest Accord, am I right?

Yeah, let's just say "The Hoof is Full" of teenagers and softies.

Not the good kind either, the kind that have nothing better to do but to troll, report, cry, whatever. I don't care what you do with yourself when pushing buttons behind a screen.

What's trolling? Stay around long enough, you will know.

Alright- alright, so you're still reading about this? Seriously? Wow, you must have time on your hands. Might as well tell you how to actually start.

Get someone, one of your characters, don't care who, Paladin, Warrior, Warlock, IT DOESN'T MATTER.

Alright, ya have one? Otay! Now. Think of WoW as an RPG game. What? An MMORPG has RPG Elements?! That's insane! Might as well be King of the Mountain and facesmash whoever questions you! No! Bad! Bad!

Be modest, be kind and be understanding. You might not know this, but people have different opinions! Crazy, I know! Got offended when I called ya dumb? That's an opinion, not fact. I mean, it can be true, but I have no evidence to prove how exactly worthless you are, yet.

Ok, now think of a background. Not just any background, but a damn BACKground. You know? Was your character an alcoholic, a harlot, body builder, musician, demon, house wife? What? All of the above? No! Stick to one thing and be good at it before moving on to something else.

It's called character progression. Think of a jerk inside a movie of you enjoy, if the movie was at least somewhat memorable you actually liked the jerk because he -changed- over the course of the film and was likeable. Yeah, Roleplaying is like acting, I am sorry it took you that long to realize that.

You can decide what happens to your character, if a subject gets too touchy or sensitive for you. JUST LET THE DAMN PERSON YOU'RE ROLEPLAYING WITH KNOW THAT. And drop the Roleplay or start over, it doesn't matter.

There are no perfect characters, NONE, ZERO, DUES EX MACHINA, SHINING FINGER, NOTHING, this is medieval steam punk fashion, WU-TANG style.

No, seriously, think of this as a Medieval era, give your character a name that fits that genre. Poopwadmgee not real enough?! Open a ticket, it's free. I should of mentioned that earlier.

I said DAMN one too many times.

Bad at typing? Practice like no tomorrow, seriously, do it.

You need a goal for your character? Goals, I bet that's something you never heard of in your life yet. What do you want from Roleplay? Do you want to be the Eric Estrada of LH? The Pimp of demons? Go crazy, but be believable. You need a solid understand of Blizzard's Lol-Lore for this game.

Got any questions? Was this convoluted mess not clear enough? Contact me in-game.


(This post is mostly made out of boredom, let's hope some people contact me to get started with Roleplaying again.)

Edit: Oh balls, I misspelled a word even when it's filtered through the spelling correction, man I feel as dumb like you now.
Edited by Ravidon on 2/2/2012 5:06 PM PST
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85 Draenei Hunter

I like this guy. His neurotic energy and productive boredom fills me with a kind of... hope... for our future. Shine on you fabulous diamond.
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90 Worgen Warrior
*joins in*

Um, wow....You sir, have balls. But at the same time, that's the kind of energy we need here! Props and future success to you, good sir.
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85 Draenei Priest
That was beautiful.
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85 Blood Elf Paladin
UPDATE: Wow, you guys have the reaction time of a my vegetative grandmother.

No luck so far, as expected. I am sorry for your lots.
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85 Human Warrior
Big talk, but you missed some fun RP over in Gilneas the other night. And by "fun" I mean "confusing as hell" because we couldn't talk cross-faction. But nobody died and we met some wonderful people and the pics were good. So it all balances out in the end.
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