squishy insides, so no cotton mouth
The first few mouthfuls of cake are almost magical, but as eating continues, enjoyment drops off precipitously. The enjoyment curve for pie appears to be much more stable over time.
Pie exhibits much greater homogeneity than cake. In cake, the highest concentration of awesomeness is found in the frosting. The act of decorating a cake can polarize it and cause a dangerously uneven distribution of frosting, leading to discord and animosity during serving time.
Can be a sex toy in a bind
Pie appears to contain a greater relative volume of enjoyable substances.
Cake is appropriate in a very limited number of situations, whereas almost any day is a great day to have pie.
Fat kids eat cake.
cool kids eat pie.