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Drama incoming. To avoid, skip to line.
So, I created this guild about 6 months before Cata was released. I had played for a while before that, but it was my first time actually running one. When I recruited people into it, my brother and my uncle both joined as well, as they were active WoW players. I was happy to have them, and they both worked hard and rose up to be officers quickly. However, the two of them never really got along, and I told them repeatedly, to keep it out of guild. Last summer, my brother brought it in-guild, and I promptly warned him, and when he failed to stop, I kicked him. Problem over.
Fast Forward to a few months ago: My brother comes to me, and apologizes for bringing drama in guild, and asks me to readmit him. I do, but he is not made an officer. He asks to become one, and I told him we'd have to see how things went. He worked very hard, and recruited a lot of members, so I promoted him to Raid Leader (an officer-in-training ish position).
Fast Forward to a few weeks ago: I was going on vacation to Disney World with my boyfriend, and so I left the guild in the hands of my AGMs - one of my regular raiders who'd been there since day one but I didn't know personally, and my uncle, who had been there since day one. While I was sitting in the airport, waiting for my flight, I received a text from my uncle saying there was a problem. I asked him what was going on, and he explained that my brother and he had gotten into an argument, and my brother was taking it into guild business. I called the other AGM, and asked him to deal with it, as I was on vacation, and had no computer.
I came back from my vacation to find that my uncle had kept his mouth shut, and done his best to not cause any drama, while my brother had been slandering him repeatedly to other guild members. The icing on the cake was that when I first logged back into the realms (after a week's vacation), my brother had hijacked my uncle's raid, running it without him.
I took my brother aside, and tried to talk to him about it. He was generally rude, and said some things that don't bear repeating, both privately to me, and loudly in guild chat. I removed him from the guild, and informed the other guild members that I was having an immediate meeting, to discuss what was happening (and find out why they thought it was okay to go on their weekly raid without their raid leader, while HE WAS ONLINE). They told me that they would rather have their regular raid leader, than my brother. I asked if they were happy with the resolution to the situation, and if they had any complaints. Some complained about things my brother had said over the week, and apparently had taken my uncle's decision to 'not say anything about the offline situation' as an admission of guilt on his part. I asked them what they wanted me to do about it. They said "Nothing, I'm just frustrated." I reminded them all that they had my contact information, and if they needed advice, or had questions, to let me know.
The next evening, I logged on to find that all but 2 of my raiders had left the guild, to join one of their alt's guilds, and raid in that.
I was upset, but moreso that my brother began insulting me publically, both in trade chat and to those who chose to remain in the guild in whispers, trying to get them to join his guild. I sent the GM of his new guild a polite mail, asking that he ask my brother to stop slandering me. The GMs response was "Girls shouldn't play wow." "Deal with it." and "Thanks for gearing and training all these raiders for me!" (Most of the raiders had joined us before they were geared, and we built them all up, often with a significant gold outlay on the guilds part, approximately 4000-5000 gold per character on average, not including mats/crafted gear/BoEs found while raiding) After that point, my uncle said "I guess no one wants me around!" And he left for SWTOR.
I've made a new rule for myself - no family members in the guild.
So now I'm sitting here with 2 raiders, and a handful of people who are 85, but don't raid that often, in the slump before Mists of Pandaria, after a mass guild exodus. How do I rebuild my ranks? Should I wait until the new expansion?
We went through a similar time. Not the family part but everyone leaving..raiders anyway. All you can do is start again. To me the best thing to do is recruit and show them it didnt destroy you. Build now and build better since you are more experianced in this. Do the few remaining have friends who want to join? The two raiders left could recruit through LFR? No doubt this will take time and effort but you all will comeout stronger than before. I use the definition of dedication when I promote to officers and ask the other officers their thoughts before I promote someone....this helps with strenghth within the ranks. No easy way to get through it. Just build better than before.
As for your brother.......he needs a beat down!
Recruiting this late in the tier is going to be extremely difficult.
I really don't have much advice for you since I cannot really tell what type of guild you are based on your post. It sounds like you're a casual raiding guild with relaxed standards of performance and attendance. This style of raiding will appeal to people that don't want to make a commitment to raid x nights for y hours at z times.
My guild only has 4 original members from our inception and we have been wildly successful i f it's something you really want, keep plugging away.
Your brother couldn't hijack a raid without the others raiders giving him the power to do so. If a situation happened like that in my guild, I would of told him to get nic as a raider. Sooooo to me there is more to it, maybe they thought you favor your uncle, maybe they thought if anyone disagree with you, you remove them from guild. Maybe they thought it was impossible ever become an officer in your guild, or maybe raiding was to irregular.Who knows what is thinking in their head BUT a bunch of raiders do not get up and leave because of one person. To me if you could just get one person insight (some one who left) as to why a group of them left, then you will be more successful in understanding and preventing the same thing happening next time. but you have to allow that person be honest even if it hurts. Build up again, you can do it but you do need to find out why so perhaps you can look at your leadership style and not blame others.
Ugh, I know how that goes. My husband took all of my best raiders to a 25 man guild right before Cata. SCL hasn't raided since.
As Onoudientt said, recruiting now is going to be rough. DS is already old hat for a lot of people, and lots of folks have checked out til MoP. But if you want to keep the guild going, recruit and recruit hard. Don't let what happened fester and bother you as you rebuild.
First, you need to make sure to deal with the real life situation of your relationship with your brother and uncle. Games come and go, but these two are part of your life. Granted I've made good friends in this game, but none of them would ever take precedence over my family. Obviously these two have put you in the middle of something that they shouldn't have. Unfair, but reality.
As to the guild... every guild goes through upheavals. During my cancer I had half of my officers and a large group of high level toons quit due to guild drama. I had turned the guild over to my second-in-command because I knew I'd be in and out, and there was a real possibility of permanently out. I stayed in the guild, and it was hard watching someone else run it. Others still kept coming to me with guild issues and I would turn around and pass them along to him. He got burned out on all that and basically quit the guild, turning it back over to me. Two officers followed him (boyfriend/girlfriend) and used their bank guild as their new guild. Then there was a huge blowup because of raiding (which was part of the guild drama that he didn't want to deal with) and about 7 players left with their alts, which caused a panic, and one put out a rumor that I was selling the guild, which caused further panic... I lost about 1/3 of the guild in a day.
With all that, and dealing with cancer, I was ready to throw in the towel. But, things got better. We rebuilt. And now we are a happy guild again. Friendly with most that left. The ones that went to the officer's bank guild include some of our members in raids and we do the same...
It does get better.
Friends and Family doesnt really suit when it comes to having fun on a game. Mostly it involves cliques and drama that isn't wanted. This is coming from a hard progression team perspective. Like the above poster said find out the deal between your brother and your uncle. Then slap the living crap out of your brother...
You have to remember this game is just that.. a game. Pixels on a screen can only go so far so treat it as such. It hurts to get screwed over but you can overcome it. The motivation i see in all this is
Lol.. That guild won't last long I can almost foresee a drama explosion coming along when your brother pitches a hissy fit because he doesn't like someone. The gm seems like hes getting carried so let him get carried....
In the end it does hurt but use that as motivation and just move on. Look for smaller guilds with the same trouble of finding recruits and talk about a merge.
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