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Or how about our nifty customer net cannon!
Lifts up a steam hissing cannon, and fires a net at Soloaria, tangling her to the ground.
People afraid of your products? A customer that doesn't understand the meaning of a good deal? Need some aggressive marketing? Use the Blackmarket Customer Net Cannon. Guaranteed you'll never want for repeat business, as they won't be going anywhere!
You're one to talk, Neth. Sheesh, try running a cartel like I do, then tell me how easy it is to keep the PR firm going. Honestly.
Sals begins to smoke a massive cigar, surrounded by piles of gold coins.
What? It takes time to count all these.
It would appear, my good sir.
Since I have you here, let's look at our latest product. Tired of all those Griffon droppings in your beard? Sick of that gnome getting tangled in there, as they flap their gnome wings and screech uncontrollably? Well introducing Beard Wax! Seems normal right? You'd be wrong, sir!
Beard Wax is made from 100% Beard. Just apply it to the beard, and it will grow so much that in seconds your entire room is covered in beard. How does it help, you ask? Not -our- problem, at Blackmarket. We just supply the best, against the rest!
Also, some notes. As of now, Blackmarket Cartel will be shifting it's focus onto it's primary trade: Weapons and Inventions. We also manage a growing drug trade, if that appeals to anyone.
We have our Research and Development constantly working to bring new, exciting and dangerous toys to the wonderful folk of the Horde. Need a flamethrower? We have the premium "Funthrower", designed by our very own Gibbets Monroe. Designed to spew forth "Fun" at over 5000 degrees celsius.
Or how about our Tricky Whistle? Looks and sounds just like a normal guard's whistle. But when blown it calls any nearby dinos, packs of them, to rip the blower to shreds. All thanks to a nifty sonic-hypnotic suggestion matrix.
We of course accept many types, but the ones who can find work with us easily are: Bruiser types, or anyone willing to blast a spell for breaking legs, scientists and researchers, particularly for the design and construction of weapons, drugs and gadgets. Smugglers, thieves, infiltrators, saboteurs, dealers, and general business folk who can advertise and sell our wares.
GHI is nice to have, but really it's just more the creativity of it all. I never ask anyone to get an addon to join our guild. I merely suggest you have it, and it's even more fun and creative if you do. As for buyers, same thing. We deal in RP items as much as GHI ones.
Edited by Salsbury on 7/19/2012 5:01 AM PDT
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