Real Tanks of Genius

90 Human Warrior
10550
I don't know why, but I am going to pull the entire kitchen the next time I do Shadowfang Keep. I wonder if I could pull the guys outside, the entire kitchen and the boss...

Or maybe I will try the guys outside, the entire kitchen, the boss, and the stairs...

Why stop at the stairs... I could try the guys outside, the entire kitchen, the boss, the stairs and the two next rooms...

Healer screaming a few floors below...

Don't LOS me... don't LOS me... don't LO...

Fail healer... :O)

LOL... Loved the thread... :O)
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I don't know why, but I am going to pull the entire kitchen the next time I do Shadowfang Keep. I wonder if I could pull the guys outside, the entire kitchen and the boss...

Or maybe I will try the guys outside, the entire kitchen, the boss, and the stairs...

Why stop at the stairs... I could try the guys outside, the entire kitchen, the boss, the stairs and the two next rooms...

Healer screaming a few floors below...

Don't LOS me... don't LOS me... don't LO...

Fail healer... :O)

LOL... Loved the thread... :O)


You know, Commander Springvale is just one more pull away .....
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90 Blood Elf Paladin
3810
Today we salute you, Mr Armorkini Wearing Draenei Girl Guy
(Armorkini Wearing Draenei Girl Guy)

While other tanks mistakingly believe in covering their abs, arms, legs, and other vulnerable fleshy spots, you know better. Armor is for the weak. You... you have sex appeal.
(Look at my boo-boo-booties!)

Wiggly tail? Check. Other wiggly tail? Check. You have more caboose than all of Amtrak, combined.
(I got boo-boo-booty!)

Other tanks may spend hours reforging their gear, or researching stats. But for you, it's all about the look. With that exposed midriff, mountain firm missiles, and killer, she-devil smile, you cultivate the image that says "come here big boy, come light my fire."
(Hey, don't touch my boo-boo-booty!!)

So here is to you Mr Gender Bending Streetwalker Tanking Girl Guy. Because while you may -- or may not -- be able to tank, we'll be too busy staring and taking screenshots to care, and for that you'll always be a hero... to us.
(Mr Armorkini Wearing Draenei Girl Guy)


Hey!! Look at my armor its real metal!!
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90 Night Elf Death Knight
12055
02/19/2013 05:04 PMPosted by Tivana
Hey!! Look at my armor its real metal!!

In the same way that Princess Leia's stripper outfit was metal, sure.

Put some real armor on, the sha do not want to rub your belly.
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90 Night Elf Monk
8430
Today we salute you, Mr Tanking Cata Dungeons in Wrath Greens Guy
(Tanking Cata Dungeons in wrath Greens Guy)

While other tanks toil in Mount Hyjal, earning level eighty greens, you try one quest and decide "hey, if stuff hits this hard, I'll let some random healer deal with it."
(Gimme my pet healer!)

Your party may stare at you in dismay and say things like "why is your health so low?" and "are you sure you're a tank?". You rise above it, because you have an ego the size of Azeroth, plate mail spandex, and a tiny little shield icon next to your name.
(Plate mail spandex!)

Getting hit for half your health in one blow? That's more vengeance! Less than 20k maximum health? That's less for the healer to deal with! You sir are all about efficiency.
(Look at my DPS!!)

Even when you group dies, cries, and goes running for the hills, you are confident in the knowledge you CAN tank. After all, dying is just the healer's fault.
(Why can't you keep me up?!!)

So here's to you Mr Getting Double Shotted Too Lazy To Work For His Gear Guy. Because without you, we wouldn't appreciate people who actually make the effort, and for that you'll always be a hero, to us.
(Mr Tanking Cata Dungeons in Wrath Greens Guy!)
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85 Draenei Shaman
12110
http://www.thedailyblink.com/2013/02/azerothian-trolls-of-genius/
-----
Combat tables, diminishing returns and you!
http://us.battle.net/wow/en/forum/topic/2489160859
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90 Blood Elf Paladin
1515
As far as I am aware you can't enter cata dungeons through the dungeon finder unless you have got cata gear to up your item level. Your post confuses me lightning.

Unless the gear that drops from wrath heroics has a high enough item level, I never did any of those while leveling.
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90 Night Elf Warrior
15535

Er... I thought tanks had the longest LFR queues of all. If I queue as tank and healer, I'm 99% likely to be assigned healer. Tanks only get good queues in LFD.

This was certainly true when the LFRs first opened. I found DPS queues to consistently be faster than tank queues.

The tank queues reached an hour long wait because many tanks (including those that do normal and perhaps heroic content) were queueing due to the limited rate at which better gear could be obtained.

I suppose some people probably queued to see the fights before they attempted normal mode encounters.

At this point in the current tier of content, the most people that regularly play tanks don't need gear from LFR, so far fewer tanks are queueing and tank queues are very fast. They haven't quite reached the instant dungeon queues largely because of the different ratio of tanks to DPS (2:17 in LFR compared to 2:6 in LFD) and tanks to healers (1:3 in LFR compared to 1:1 in LFD).

Healer queues for LFR are not necessarily instant, but they have been very quick and usually the fastest throughout this tier of content.
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90 Dwarf Warrior
8740
Here's to you, Mr DPS Warrior in Defensive Stance Guy(DPS Warrior in Defensive Stance Guy)


I have only wiped my guild raid group once or twice from this. But by accident though :)
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90 Human Warrior
16760
02/23/2013 03:13 PMPosted by Lightning
(Plate mail spandex!)


Best quote in the best thread!
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90 Blood Elf Paladin
3810
02/19/2013 05:28 PMPosted by Krinu
Put some real armor on, the sha do not want to rub your belly.


I disagree, in the same way you would rub Buddha's belly, FOR SCIENCE!!! and luck.

This thread is great, keep them coming I am laughing all the way through
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90 Human Paladin
8745
I swear when I read the post I read exactly the following and I was then compelled to go to the store and fulfill my hunger and thirst all at the same time.

Post name I saw at first was "Real Tanks of Guinness" Because I love Guinness.
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90 Night Elf Death Knight
13600
best tanking forum yet, keep up the good work! :)
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90 Troll Druid
6980
Today we salute you, Mr. Spastic Dancing Tank Guy
(Mr. Spastic Dancing Tank Guy)

While other tanks put the boss in a boring and predictable position, you dance around the room like a spastic chiuaua on crack, wowing your party with your awesome dance moves.
(shake that littledog booty)

You spurn the use of anything at range - you know that you can drag everyting around the room to personally hit each mob individually
(it makes them feel so loved)

Even the boss can join in by spinning around with you - helping you to share the cleaves and dragonbreath with your freinds
(smells like spring flowers)

Your healer is in on the act too, he/she loves to play hide and LOS
(pole dancing healer)

So here's to you Mr. Drag the Fire Over Here Tank Guy - Because without you, the DPS would just have to hit the boss, and would never learn how to boogie, and for that you'll always be a hero, to us.
(Mr. Spastic Dancing Tank Guy)
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90 Tauren Paladin
11340
Alright, that one was pretty good, hagbardc.
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