You want it? You got it!
We only kissed once. We were drinking and I starting choking on the lime in my long island iced tea. Agitator gave me CPR and one thing led to another...now he's pregnant with my intestinal worms and I won't return any of his calls.
Agitator, I realize it takes two to tango but you walked into this situation knowing I was already dead. Why did you need to give me mouth-to-mouth if I'm undead, bro? You came onto me and I reciprocated those feelings because I felt bad for you because noone likes you.
You are having my intestinal worms and nothing can change that. I'm sorry if you feel I took the best years of your life from you but it's no longer about you and me. It's about those intestinal worms wriggling and gestating in your abdomen. It's about them now and they need us, more than ever.
I guess what I'm saying is...will you marry me? Think of the intestinal worms before you render a decision.
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