Greetings, Runetotem. As the once-venerated, since-deposed President of Runetotem, I send you mustache-twirling greetings from exile.
Looking out from my top secret fortress atop Oomew's refrigerator, I see what's become of the Runetotem community and weep giant, salty tears of schadenfreude. Ask yourself: are *you* better off than you were four years ago? Under my regime, there was toilet paper on every spindle. Bacon in every sandwich. Who stood between you all and all this CRZ nonsense? That's right - I did. Now, you are being asked to share your formerly-glorious realm with a 12-year old mage name LAzzORz from Tichondrius who keeps whispering you to ask if you are a "real girl".
<Is Out Of Mana>, one of Runetotem's longest guilds, has always prided itself on bringing character to the community, much in the way a giant, hairy mole can bring character to the face or flank of an otherwise ordinary individual. We've been the raisin on your toast, the accidental F# in your lullabye, the awapuhi fragrance in your shampoo, for as long as most of you can remember. Isn't it time you gave something back?
We are looking to press a number of new adventurers into service. The number is five, and five is the number. Our initiation process can be ... somewhat uncomfortable, and we prefer to take in only a few at a time so that the whimpering will have tapered off before we draw more from the bourgeois.
What you can expect:
1) A dark, oppressive environment wherein other guildmates are afraid to speak to you for fear of "the toilet snake";
2) Irregular raid times, attendance, and progress;
3) Weekly tributes of crafted platform shoes and hair tonics; and
4) Darth Vader impersonation contests.
That is all. I expect to see your applications on my freezer door by morning: ioom.enjin.com