How to play Hearthstone - Sarcasm only

Play Mode Discussion
Hi Guys,

This is how it goes

copy netdeck
getting pissed not to have all cards
go to forum and complain about the pay to win game
scraping the dust together with aggro/cancer decks
winstreak until higher rank
loose a game
try adding the player that made you loose and start swearing at him/her
go rage in forum
complain that someone played against you with a golden hero portrait
complain about the worst meta ever
express your hapiness that you did not preorder any cards
Blame the RNG
Go to a thread with a "blue" response and complain that they don't post in more important threads, then post a link to your own thread
meme about decks you hate playing against and request a nerf
provide valid proof of the rigged matchmaking
join at least 1 discussion about emotes
downvote everyone with not your opinion
rope all decks you memed earlier against
give blizzard an ultimatum with a clear deadline
Inform everybody why it was better in earlier days and why you quit
let blizzard know how many month you are planning not to play
Stop playing but still stick to the forum and create posts for only sarcastic people.
Rage about Ninja nerfs of cards you dont own - claim a fraud - uninstall the client and never been seen again

For the Horde !

Also a few tips:
If you are not really in the mood to play hearthstone - play it anyways !
If you have a loose streak dont take a break - now its not a good time !

It is constantly edited :)
Always remember that the most important skill of a true Hearthstone player is making memes about the decks you hate playing against.
Me trade? No me go face!
You forgot about claiming that the whole thing is rigged against you. Very important to do that on the forum
05/20/2018 05:02 PMPosted by Koore
You forgot about claiming that the whole thing is rigged against you. Very important to do that on the forum


How dare I ? edit incoming :)
Rope my opponent every turn for no better reason than they are beating my carefully copied netdeck using cards I have never even seen before because I only got the ones in the netdeck, so unfair.
Turn one coin + hero power
05/20/2018 07:22 PMPosted by Gurggz
Turn one coin + hero power

This is actually really useful in some cases
Always have 10 windows open on all the major streamers, and ask them live what to do about your game. If they start ignoring you, move on to smaller scale streamers.
Only play Tavern Brawl for gold, and abuse the brawl's gimmick to do so instead of having fun with it *coughcoughalltheaggrohunters,arcanemisslemages,andmilldruidsintop2standardcoughcough*
Use Baku and Genn in the same deck
05/21/2018 01:56 PMPosted by DarthSil
Only play Tavern Brawl for gold, and abuse the brawl's gimmick to do so instead of having fun with it *coughcoughalltheaggrohunters,arcanemisslemages,andmilldruidsintop2standardcoughcough*


I had a quest to win 3 matches as hunter/druid, so of course I went with murlocs during the last brawl :P
If you equal raging = pointing out the broken cards and decks around, then count me in!
05/21/2018 07:57 PMPosted by SweetTexas77
Use Baku and Genn in the same deck


Upgraded hero power that costs (1)? Sign me up!
05/20/2018 07:22 PMPosted by Gurggz
Turn one coin + hero power


That used to be every opener. Coin + bloodfen raptor or ooze, and if you didn’t have those, hero power. Even as mage XD
Concede means you win, do it, it's cool...
To be truly effective you need to quit the game and tell Blizzard they made a terrible game and then continue to play it and post on the forums.

This shows Blizzard who is BOSS
Don't forget to declare that you're glad you didn't preorder any cards
05/20/2018 07:41 PMPosted by Koore
05/20/2018 07:22 PMPosted by Gurggz
Turn one coin + hero power

This is actually really useful in some cases


In what cases? I can't think of a single one where the coin wouldn't be more useful later on...
05/22/2018 09:01 AMPosted by Elgareth
05/20/2018 07:41 PMPosted by Koore
...
This is actually really useful in some cases


In what cases? I can't think of a single one where the coin wouldn't be more useful later on...


I was playing against a lock and they dropped kobold librarian on turn 1. I had Keleseth and Zola in hand, but no 1 drops. I wanted to copy Keleseth, but I knew the librarian would just trade into him, so I hero powered the librarian down turn 1, then keleseth turn 2, then copied him turn 3. Worked out pretty nicely.

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