Starcraft Poem

Joeyray's Bar
It's only part way done. It pretty much sums up what happened in the first Starcraft. If I get a lot of positive feedback, I will most likely continue on with Brood war and finally, Wings of Liberty...At least until Heart of the swarm and Legacy of the void. Lol And also, feel free to tell me if there are any grammatical errors or misspellings. Much appreciated.

Vessels of the stars, traveling through the void of space
Crash landed on planets unknown, not knowing what to face
The terrans strive to live, in the center, oppression rules all
But one man fights the Confederacy, Mengsk and the Sons of Korhal
Letting loose the shackles of the people who were held down
But later learning, something horrific is yet to be found
Warships of an unknown origin incinerated the planet without warning
Derelict surface of what was once home, lives now in mourning
But that was only the beginning for there is a hidden shadow of evil incarnate
The swarm as they arecalled, never ending, with burning eyes of pure hate
Overwhelming everything, consuming all that there is without remorse
The Commander of the Sons of Korhal still stuck with the course
To bring down the Confederacy and all that it stood for
And build a new empire with him in power of everything and more
A marine pure of heart, joined along with a fiery temptress
She’s a sniper so refined, her shots have never been known to miss
A full revolt started in the main capitol on Antiga Prime
Where this was Mengsk’s moment to shine
Luring death itself, the swarm overwhelmed
And the commander himself was at the helm
But there was no stopping the plans that were set in motion
The blind thirst for power, the commander’s only devotion
The great betrayal is when Kerrigan was sent down to New Gettysburg
And take out the protoss who were trying to stop the infamous zerg
And as the last of the Confederacy, to the ground it burned
Kerrigan needed to get out but Mengsk, his back was turned
And he created something worse when he left her behind
It was then Jim knew what went on in Mengsk’s mind
He didn’t care about anything as long as he sits on the throne
Even if it was built from the lost lives, made from all their bones
Kerrigan was gone, Jim swore that Mengsk would pay
He went to search for her, but was too late to save the day.
The Dominion rose out of the ashes of the old
But not everything has yet to be told
Jim could not handle the death of someone like her
He went out to get justice, he wanted to make sure
And set out into the unknown to make everything right
For the love he had for her was never out of sight

But there was a side of the story that we have yet to realize
That the zerg over mind had a plan that began to materialize
Out of the betrayal came a force of Hell
Kerrigan was alive but infested as well
The Queen of blades was born, ruthless without morals
Would make everything that happened before like minor quarrels
But the Overmind sensed a loss of control when Zeratul killed a cerebrate
That was not a loss however when the Overmind sealed the Protoss fate
A fleeting telepathic contact let the over mind know the Protoss homeword of Auir
And laid down a siege that would burn that world in an unholy fire
When all seemed lost, Jim allied himself with the Protoss to take on the swarm
The great Tassadar knew what he had to do in this most unholy storm
He gathered the energy of his people to bring down this abomination
And with his life, sought to end the zerg and their tribulation

The zerg thought to be gone, through a hero’s life, he parted
The Queen of Blades is still here and her reign has not yet started
Dude, you have some real talent. Do one about Brood war. Looking forward to it.
Just uploaded the Brood war one. Hope you enjoy.

http://us.battle.net/sc2/en/forum/topic/2973016829
You sir will be a good rapper :)
Heh. If only I was into rap.
Dude you should totally write Starcraft Songs, Rap is the most popular with the masses at the moment with its ability to hook you with catchy beats and cheap rhymes lol, but its really important for the rhymes to have impact, some people have flow naturally but someone like me are really struggling to write something captivating with rap songs and resort to borrowing original songs and just make machinima from there, thats why in the music industry hiring song writers are top dollar cuz its really hard to come up with original writing.

i smell talent in the air man :) i really underestimated poets before, if they have good beats and flow they use that talent in song writing.

EDIT:

Heres some examples btw:

http://www.dailymotion.com/video/x22sn2x_zerg-is-the-best-rap-by-c-dubs_music

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