Memorial Arena

Joeyray's Bar
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Ok everyone, I am remodeling my arena and I decided to add a few features, I will be adding a memorial to all of the honored RPers of Joeyray's.

I will add all the stuff in a second, then we shall have a grand reopening tonight. And we want the best fighters to fight tonight.

And the loser, I am sorry. But smylez gets your livers and kidneys.
08/19/2012 12:43 PMPosted by CrymsonRaven
And the loser, I am sorry. But smylez gets your livers and kidneys.

"You are too kind."
I drag a clone down into the arena a beat him and give smylez his livers and kidneys. "This is his punishment for speaking out against me. I never contradict myself! Well actually I do sometimes. BUT I NEVER DO OTHER THAN THOSE SOMETIMES!"
Jukebox. More of a Jukeling, actually. Feed him a quarter, and make your selection. Just keep your fingers clear o' those jaws.

Sweet Home Alabama - No, I don't know what 'Alabama' is, but the song's a classic.

The Ballad of the Trollhunters - A song of brave warriors who fought against evil. Actually, more 'stupidity' than evil.

Tha Balid of tha Trole - not to be confused with the previous selection. This is a song about a powerful being who destroyed everything in his path against all odds. Contains numerous grammatical errors.

Gimme Three Steps - Yeah, I like this one. Written by Lynyrd Skynyrd, Blizzard's favorite band.

Twinkle Twinkle Little Star - I fought, but they made me.
The more savory dishes

Broodling Legs - Whaddya mean, "why are you serving Zerg in a Roach Warren?" Think about it for a while.

Marine - Terran, boiled until the shell takes on a delicious red color. Or, blue color... or black color... You know, I'm beginning to think they already looked like that.

100% Angus Burger - Don't ask me. All I know is I get 'em from the same place Zanon gets his milk.

Roast Troll - A bunch of guys came over from the bar and sold this to me cheap. I pass on the savings!

Steak - This guy kept sayin' "stop staring at me like I'm a piece of meat." Tell the truth, I was.
Pizzeria Menu

Good old Pepperoni: What the name implies. Just choose your type of cheese.

Meat Lovers: Every kind of meat you can think of, and some you haven't. Choose your cheese.

Deep Space cheese: Why's it glowing?

Zergling Pie: Careful, it's prone to try to eat you!

Protoss Special: Not sure whats in the crust or on the pizza. Still trying to figure out why a Protoss made a pizza.

Mind Melter: Inspire by a drink from Zanon's bar. Not sure what the chef used, but it has similar affects as the Mind Shredder.

Custom: Take anything you can come up with and order it. If it's popular enough, I'll add it to the menu!


Cheddar, Habenero Jack, Deep Space Cheese, Predatory Feeling, Whatever the chef used on the Mind Melter, Monterrey.


Pepperoni, Sausage, Bacon, Canadian Bacon, other meats (you can name them and I'll add them to the list. Too brain dead to do it myself right now), zerglings, pineapple, olives, and various fruits and veggies from across the Koprulu sector.
Zanon's Bar Menu

A Jim Raynor -- Cheap, harsh, and served up warm in a filthy glass.

A Tychus Findlay -- You’re not actually sure what it is, but you spilled a few drops and the counter is still smoking.

The Zeratul -- It isn’t served to you, instead it appears from the shadows. Then, when you try to drink it, you experience weird visions and the glass disappears.

Zergling “Special” -- “Hello my baby, hello my honey, hello my rag-time gal…”

Firebat -- Burns goin’ down AND comin’ back up.

Psi-Storm -- Hits so hard you’ll remember what happened tomorrow, yesterday.

Grounds for Divorce -- Matt Horner was drinking these when he “won” a fateful card game.

What He’s Having -- Kachinsky always seems to be in here, so whatever he’s having must be pretty good.

Baneling Body Shot -- Are you sure this is a good idea? I’m not sure where to put the lime...

A Glass of Milk -- “Whaddya mean there aren’t any cows in Koprulu? Where’d this come from then?“

The Solar Shot -- For those looking for a good time. Flame-proof clothing recommended, cuz you’ll be shining brighter than the star of Typhon.

Korhalian BackStabber -- Good for the recently betrayed and left for dead.

The Jail Breaker -- new from the recently opened New Folsom Prison Bar.

The Bloody Medic -- kills the pain, but we still say you should have a doctor check that out.

Redstone Mixer -- expensive, but I can guarantee it’ll be served in a clean and sterilized glass. Careful, that lava’s hot.

The Broadcaster -- You’re not ready for the raw $ex appeal this sucker brings. A favorite of a certain ex-convict.

The Hellracer -- suspension of sobriety is an integral part of any drinking experience, but this experience requires suspension of sobriety and inhibitions.

The Maelstrom Shocker -- Only served here, a 40% bigger hit than standard Shockers, guaranteed.

Psionic Cooler -- yes, I know it feels weird. Don’t worry, the energy coming out of your body should wear off in a couple days

(insert generic letters to indicate gibberish) -- I don’t know what’s in it either, but that guy down there had one. He started screaming and thrashing for a while, and now he hasn’t gotten up off the floor in over an hour.

The Judicator -- Perfect for influencing the minds of the intoxicated.

Prismatic Void -- Gets better with every drink. Has been known to be lethal.

Mind Shredder: perfect for those wishing to forget everything and start a new life. For anyone not wishing to do this, this drink isn’t advised.

Scotty Bolgers old no. 8: the good stuff

Andorian Ale: Can’t tell you how I got this, its a trade secret.

Charge: Made using stim and several other ingredients. Side effects vary.

Mjolnir (Thor’s Hammer): If you really want to feel hammered, this is for you. Served with a side of hot lead.

Enlightenment: tell me when you get there.

Marine: may cause you to see the counter vanish

Feedback: served cold. All those annoying voices in your head start telling you what you did wrong today.

M.U.L.E.: Good buzz, but may cause a break down later.

Haven Splitter: you’ll either feel warm, safe, and content, or depressed, paranoid, and possibly like injecting yourself with random serums. 50/50 shot.

Ace Suicide: I don’t actually know what this does. Nor do I recommend it.

Alcoholic Projector: Ever wanted to know what you’re actually like when you get totally trashed? Take a few sips of this, and all the alcohol in your system will condense into a ‘party’ version of yourself, where you are completely wasted, have no inhibitions, and are just out for a ‘little’ fun. The more you’ve drunk beforehand, the better the projection. Have fun!

The HBRB: however crazy you think you are, this will make you worse. Yes, that includes you, namesake.

The Noodle Incident: we all know what happens when you take this. It needs no explanation.

Little bit of everything: Exactly what it says. I’ve taken everything I’ve got, mixed it together, and put in the laser accelerator for a few hours. There’s no telling what will happen.

Slicer: Has the unique property that it changes effect depending on the drinker's personality, amplifying any traits they have a good thousand times over. Buzzes in the back of your skull begin after three drinks, amplify slowly, and you randomly sprout wings after the 11th glass.

The Scoutmaster: May result in the drinkee feeling experiencing high levels of Trustworthiness, Loyalty, Helpfulness, Friendliness, Courtesy, Kindness, Obedience, Cheerfulness, Thriftiness, Bravery, Cleanliness, and Reverence. Not Recommended for parties.

Mar Sara Black: need a pick me up, or something for radiation poisoning? Or jut something to get a good buzz going that doesn’t break down? Then say good night, because we won’t be seeing you until the morning. If you wake up.

Drink accessories:

pylon shards (for those that need that extra crunchy glitter)

hydralisk spine umbrella (not for the more bubbly drinks)

Mentos: you’ve seen that experiment with Coke? Wait till you see what happens with this stuff.

Laser accelerator: Heh heh, you think you’ve had it all? Time for a little ‘randomosity’. Maximum time of one week.
The Arena's "Special" Dishes and Drinks.

Fried liver and onions: You aren't sure, but it seems familiar.
"You forgot human flesh." I start eating one of the boiled Marines while beating and tearing out the kidneys and liver of a clone. They kept regenerating so fast.
You want human flesh on the menu?
"Allow me to be the cook. I can also treat our clients if they so wish."
"Of course I do. And I want Kaiser blade shreds as another thing you can have on top of food and drink."
How about this smylez, you can cook, but you have to follow the recipe exactly. But you are in complete charge in the fried liver and onions. And how about you don't take anything vital from the contestant and you can't take the winners organs.
"Done and done. I guess I can't introduce my own recipes eh?"
*Walks into the pizza kitchen and puts on chefs hat.* I'M BACK IN BUSINESS!
Depends, what are they?
I resume my seat over in the corner. Umbra, Jess, and Kentel are with me. "A pizza, some hot wings, and a round of Prismatic Voids mixed with Slicers! And make sure to add a cherry to mine!"
I was making the Prismatic Voids, mixed with the Slicers. "Shadow, what kind of cherry do you want? And Zarkun, get them their food, pronto!"
"Maraschino, if you do so please."
I get back up, dragging the clone by the hair. I throw him at smylez. "Make me a pie out of him."
I put a Maraschino cherry on Shadow's Prismatic Void. I bring the drinks on a tray. "Sorry about all of this, I just remodeled, and are you going to make it to the special grand reopening event tonight?"
"All my characters that didn't die in my imagination will come. Gary will probably figure out a way to see it without having to put on his special 'stare at bright light lenses.'"
*Quickly sets to work on the order.* What kind of wings and which pizza?

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