Zanon's PRP Bar (Part12)

Joeyray's Bar
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Continued From Zanon'sPRP Bar(Part11)
The code of conduct remains unchanged my friends, what I say goes, and the roaches in the back haven't been fed recently. (Please excuse me while I fix that)

Now to the important stuff...

Drink menu:

A Jim Raynor -- Cheap, harsh, and served up warm in a filthy glass.

A Tychus Findlay -- You’re not actually sure what it is, but you spilled a few drops and the counter is still smoking.

The Zeratul -- It isn’t served to you, instead it appears from the shadows. Then, when you try to drink it, you experience weird visions and the glass disappears.

Zergling “Special” -- “Hello my baby, hello my honey, hello my rag-time gal…”

Firebat -- Burns goin’ down AND comin’ back up.

Psi-Storm -- Hits so hard you’ll remember what happened tomorrow, yesterday.

Grounds for Divorce -- Matt Horner was drinking these when he “won” a fateful card game.

What He’s Having -- Kachinsky always seems to be in here, so whatever he’s having must be pretty good.

Baneling Body Shot -- Are you sure this is a good idea? I’m not sure where to put the lime...

A Glass of Milk -- “Whaddya mean there aren’t any cows in Koprulu? Where’d this come from then?“

The Solar Shot -- For those looking for a good time. Flame-proof clothing recommended, cuz you’ll be shining brighter than the star of Typhon.

Korhalian BackStabber -- Good for the recently betrayed and left for dead.

The Jail Breaker -- new from the recently opened New Folsom Prison Bar.

The Bloody Medic -- kills the pain, but we still say you should have a doctor check that out.

Redstone Mixer -- expensive, but I can guarantee it’ll be served in a clean and sterilized glass. Careful, that lava’s hot.

The Broadcaster -- You’re not ready for the raw $ex appeal this sucker brings. A favorite of a certain ex-convict.

The Hellracer -- suspension of sobriety is an integral part of any drinking experience, but this experience requires suspension of sobriety and inhibitions.

The Maelstrom Shocker -- Only served here, a 40% bigger hit than standard Shockers, guaranteed.

Psionic Cooler -- yes, I know it feels weird. Don’t worry, the energy coming out of your body should wear off in a couple days

(insert generic letters to indicate gibberish) -- I don’t know what’s in it either, but that guy down there had one. He started screaming and thrashing for a while, and now he hasn’t gotten up off the floor in over an hour.

The Judicator -- Perfect for influencing the minds of the intoxicated.

Prismatic Void -- Gets better with every drink. Has been known to be lethal.

Mind Shredder: perfect for those wishing to forget everything and start a new life. For anyone not wishing to do this, this drink isn’t advised.

Scotty Bolgers old no. 8: the good stuff

Andorian Ale: Can’t tell you how I got this, its a trade secret.

Charge: Made using stim and several other ingredients. Side effects vary.

Mjolnir (Thor’s Hammer): If you really want to feel hammered, this is for you. Served with a side of hot lead.

Enlightenment: tell me when you get there.

Marine: may cause you to see the counter vanish

Feedback: served cold. All those annoying voices in your head start telling you what you did wrong today.

M.U.L.E.: Good buzz, but may cause a break down later.

Haven Splitter: you’ll either feel warm, safe, and content, or depressed, paranoid, and possibly like injecting yourself with random serums. 50/50 shot.

Ace Suicide: I don’t actually know what this does. Nor do I recommend it.

Alcoholic Projector: Ever wanted to know what you’re actually like when you get totally trashed? Take a few sips of this, and all the alcohol in your system will condense into a ‘party’ version of yourself, where you are completely wasted, have no inhibitions, and are just out for a ‘little’ fun. The more you’ve drunk beforehand, the better the projection. Have fun!

The HBRB: however crazy you think you are, this will make you worse. Yes, that includes you, namesake.

The Noodle Incident: we all know what happens when you take this. It needs no explanation.

Little bit of everything: Exactly what it says. I’ve taken everything I’ve got, mixed it together, and put in the laser accelerator for a few hours. There’s no telling what will happen.

Slicer: Has the unique property that it changes effect depending on the drinker's personality, amplifying any traits they have a good thousand times over. Buzzes in the back of your skull begin after three drinks, amplify slowly, and you randomly sprout wings after the 11th glass.

The Scoutmaster: May result in the drinkee feeling experiencing high levels of Trustworthiness, Loyalty, Helpfulness, Friendliness, Courtesy, Kindness, Obedience, Cheerfulness, Thriftiness, Bravery, Cleanliness, and Reverence. Not Recommended for parties.

Mar Sara Black: need a pick me up, or something for radiation poisoning? Or jut something to get a good buzz going that doesn’t break down? Then say good night, because we won’t be seeing you until the morning. If you wake up.

The Smylez: This beverage is delicious, trust me. Drinking it will have absolutely no harmful effects on you (please ignore the green smoke), and your liver and kidneys will not be damaged in the least. Seriously.

Drink accessories:

pylon shards (for those that need that extra crunchy glitter)

hydralisk spine umbrella (not for the more bubbly drinks)

Mentos: you’ve seen that experiment with Coke? Wait till you see what happens with this stuff.

Laser accelerator: Heh heh, you think you’ve had it all? Time for a little ‘randomosity’. Maximum time of one week.

The menu will updated every so often, so check back to see if there is anything new you might like to try. There are only two rules here: If anyone starts a bar fight I will either:

1) throw you into the pen of Roaches I keep in the back. I feed them regularly, but you know how voracious Zerg are

2) personally blow your head off, and use your dead body to make new drinks

and 2: what happens in the bar, stays in the bar.

So come. Drink. Enjoy. Chat with friends. Make new ones. Pick up a date [or a one night stand ;) ]. Drown your sorrows. Complain about your life. For those of the literary bent, use this opportunity to get the creative juices [among other things] flowing.

As long as you pay your tab, and don’t break anything, I really don’t care what you do. And the best part is: no hangovers!
---Reserved for Bar History & Events---

Thundercrash starts it. (Thundercrash PRP bar)

I take it over. (Zanon's PRP Bar, parts 1-4)

Thundercrash takes it back. (Thundercrash Bar Dimension)

I take it back (Zanon's PRP Bar, parts 5-7)

I leave for a few days, and will it to Draconus (The New Bar, Parts 1-2)

Smylez hijacks the new bar. (Chaos)

Zanon's PRP Bar (Part 8-12)
I don't know what to say...but some people at school are saying that I really need to get a girlfriend though. *Sighs*
Well, !@#$. Zanon already made one over an hour ago. I didn't notice because Thundercrash made a reply in Part 11, five minutes ago.

Post in this one please.

Any who, I'm I interrupting something?
Point taken, Thunder. I will have to try that.
If it didn't mean that I, seriously the only person here under 5'5", would get knocked silly.

I was made smart, small, and placed in a neighborhood where telling a girl "no" equals her getting to use you as a punching bag for a week.
There is no God.
"One day..."
Hi guys srry about that Zerg thing. On a different note hows your days been


In that case, your best bet would be to somehow manipulate girls A and B into fighting each other, while simultaneously determining which one is less of a !@#$%.

And would it really be so bad having a girlfriend? I would kill to be in your position.
Draconus...there is no way out like Thunder said and there is no easy solution. It truly is sad though when a couple of my...friends, are telling me that I need to get a girlfriend because I look like I could use one I guess.

I am forever cursed of being shy...
I'm actually trying to figure out the eternal question usually posed to the best (why me, I don't understand):
Which one.

Also, I fear the wrath of the other two.
Can't argue with you there, Raven. It has been starting to depress me how lonely my life is.
I'm actually trying to figure out the eternal question usually posed to the best (why me, I don't understand):
Which one.

Also, I fear the wrath of the other two.

Well, it sounds like you don't need to worry about girl C. All you said is that she has assumed that girl B is your girlfriend, not that she had any interest in you.

Again, for girls A and B, find out which one is less of a !@#$%, and revel in the care that she will give after getting the crap beaten out of you by the other.
Well, have you managed to have a girlfriend for more than a month? I swear that my relationships only lasted around a month each. Maybe it was because I was pushy and a sex friend.
I sorta have a girlfriend....

Our friends coerced us into admitting it ._.

Now they mock us whenever possible ._.

I am no help in this situation.
All the pretty girls in grade are

A: Catty b!tches who I hate
B: Nice but im shy and they probably have a BF
Girl A blatantly hit on me.
Girl B saw the whole thing, and stated not too long ago that she likes me.
Girl C also saw, and assumes she is my girlfriend for whatever reason.
How do I navigate this without anyone getting hurt (me in particular?)

Which one do you like?

On another note, this isn't a fairy tail. It's unlikely that no one will get hurt.
All the pretty girls in grade are

A: Catty b!tches who I hate
B: Nice but im shy and they probably have a BF
So sad but true...
*Sulks in the corner*
Don't date out of "Peer pressure." Too much strain on your pocket book.
Politely inform your friends, that you have no interest in dating, at this point and time, and speak to Girls B, "and C?(If you like her personality)" and become good friends with them.
If they are interested, they will ask you if you are interested, if not, they aren't. Just relax and take it easy.

"A" sounds like a Pushy jerk. Who will ditch you because someone else is more attractive.
*Joins Raven in the corner*

Misery loves company.

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