Anxiety about joining a guild because of...

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Okay so in a nutshell, here's what's happened in my past experiences joining a guild in wow.

Almost every time I've joined a guild, I end up wanting to quit because of another female that's in the guild.
It's gotten to the point where I'm actively looking for an all male guild.

I've found that women in the mmorpg community can be very territorial. ( At least the ones I've run into )
And they seem to enjoy being the only female in the guild, getting the attention --talking on discord ..etc

This has made me not even want to try and find a guild because of the behavior I've had to put up with in the past.
I've had guild leaders girlfriends kick me from the guild because they were jealous of the attention I was getting, I've had actual guild leaders that were female do the exact same thing.

I've had guy members that weren't allowed to talk to me in discord because their girlfriend/wife didn't like it.

It just seems ridiculous.

I don't know if I just have bad luck or if a majority of gamer girls are like this ( I'm honestly not... ) but it's given me anxiety and made me not want to join a guild at all. I know I need to, because playing this game alone is getting very lonely...
The concept of “GamerGirl Turf Wars” is both hilarious and sad.

I don’t think most of the female playerbase is like that.
I came from a horde guild that had 4 or 5 core raiders that were female. We never had any drama. The only bit of drama came from a drama queen male which I found hilarious. It was fairly mild compared to some drama I've seen and been in in the past.
Perhaps I am being unfair, but my general perception of women is that they are really really really mean to each other all the time. Not just in games but every where always.

I sometimes go to the bar on the weekends just to watch people and man - the way women sometimes look at other women, women they have never met and do not know at all, is pretty crazy.

Women toss shade at each other for absolutely no reason.
08/22/2018 06:43 AMPosted by Patchs
The concept of “GamerGirl Turf Wars” is both hilarious and sad.

I don’t think most of the female playerbase is like that.


It is pretty funny lol. Girls are the wooooorst haha. All my friends IRL are dudes for this reason.
Only one hen per hen-house.

Do yourself a favor and never reveal your sex. Don't speak on voice comms. It's the best advice I can give.
I'd offer to play but, different faction and server and all.

I think most of us who've been playing can empathize somewhat. Not with your exact situation, or exactly how you feel about it, but just with dealing with crappy guild drama in general. I know I can.

I hope you're able to find a guild that suits you though! Assuming you go looking for one. I'm sure there are plenty out there that don't have that specific problem.
Generalizing people won't help anything either, and this mentality is likely keeping you from joining worthwhile groups of people. Women are not homogeneous in nature by any means.

When joining a guild that you know has female members, you can immediately address this by going over your past experiences with them, and likely they will provide you reassurance that they won't behave like this. Either that or you will essentially be anticipating their behaviour in a public setting, which would either result in the nullification of said behaviour, or send someone into a frenzy because they were called out. Either way, things should be made pretty clear to you pretty early on! Happy hunting!
Not all guilds are like that. Mine actually has a decent amount of women in it and none are like what you described. There are decent guilds out here, you just were not lucky enough to find the good ones yet.

I've been with this guild for over a year and only left this summer to go kill some mythic bosses but I am back and ready to clear heroic once again with them like with every tier I have done with them since Nighthold. They actually got me out of a bad guild that was crumbling down due to an officer going rogue basically and have been their main tank for (almost) ever since.

EDIT: Adding this, my suggestion is too keep looking. But to find the perfect guild for you, this may involve a server transfer or a faction change or both, so be ready for that. Good guilds exist, you just have to find it.
08/22/2018 06:47 AMPosted by Titanía
08/22/2018 06:43 AMPosted by Patchs
The concept of “GamerGirl Turf Wars” is both hilarious and sad.

I don’t think most of the female playerbase is like that.


It is pretty funny lol. Girls are the wooooorst haha. All my friends IRL are dudes for this reason.


Perhaps you might be the common denominator in all this, you might not get along with other women well then?
I wouldn't say the majority of female gamers are like this, actually. (I am one) I've met loads of others that are generally cool people, so it might just be bad luck.

Gl finding a guild, though!
Lol I was going to make a supportive post, but then I realized this is just a "pity me cuz I am a girl" post. No. You'll get no sympathy from me. I've known of girls in guilds who barely talked on the mic. If you're a girl, and you draw attention to yourself, you will be treated this way. If you keep a low profile and play well, nobody will bother you. This may sound sexist, but it's just a fact. Guys fight over women. Women tend to create drama and manipulate men even if they do not mean to. So if you really want to be treated the same, just keep a low profile.
So you postin about it on the internet? Start your own guild, den, if it be such a biggin problem for you.
Ok Troll.

I'm 99.9% you're one of those sexist "RED PILL" guys. I'm a woman who's been playing this game for 13 years and have never ONCE run into any of the issues you're talking about. Most other women I've met in game are excited to meet another female player. Most of us fly under the radar (why I don't post on my main) but we know how to find each other.

Just stop.
TIL WoW is like "The Outsiders" but for Girls.
Try working in a female dominated field like education. My personal experience has been that women are more competitive and aggressive towards each other than men. This is just personal experience and not necessarily gospel.

I have also found that in RP guilds I've been in, if there is someone causing drama, god modding, or trying to control the narrative, it has usually been a female player. I'm not saying all females are like this, but I have personally experienced more of this behavior from women than men.
The only women who do that are the lonely, self conscious ones who lean on their online friends for attention. They see you as a threat when you come into the picture. It reminds me of high school when you'd get into cat fights because you looked at someone's boyfriend the wrong way.

I've experienced that maybe a couple times in my lifetime of gaming, and even less so in WoW. (Definitely more in games with younger players, like League of Legends.)

I'm a lesbian, so I like meeting other women in wow. ecksdee
Stop anouncing you are female then, respectfully no one cares if you are male, female or whatever, if no one has asked then don't tell because most people don't care about it.
08/22/2018 06:56 AMPosted by Fenrick
Try working in a female dominated field like education. My personal experience has been that women are more competitive and aggressive towards each other than men. This is just personal experience and not necessarily gospel.

I have also found that in RP guilds I've been in, if there is someone causing drama, god modding, or trying to control the narrative, it has usually been a female player. I'm not saying all females are like this, but I have personally experienced more of this behavior from women than men.


Is that why the US has fallen 9 spots in education globally to 29th in the world over the last 10 years?

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